I promise I know the way home- telling my mom I’m happy again – saying I feel at peace- reminding everyone that I’m healed – asking God to make room for who I was at seventeen – smiling at strangers. I lie about everything I love and hate, because I don’t know the truth. I’m falling in and out of consciousness with each occurrence. I’m replaying sad songs in my mind just to understand a different meaning. Numbness is prevalent- it strangles my bones. Makes me kneel to the world and I won’t pray unless I mean it. I won’t fill God’s ears with false hopes and half hearted apologies. Tell me, what makes a person worthy, after all?